Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
