how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
You ruined the universe
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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