on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
