so that wasnt chicken after all
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
