i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Randomize
