Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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