We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Randomize
