is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
