Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Randomize