the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I enjoy the company of your penis
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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