Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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