I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
