i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
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