He is an equal opportunity slut.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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