We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
