oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
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