Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
