found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
All the doctor said was why
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
