Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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