I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
