I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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