There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I'm bleeding and have questions
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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