call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Help. Why am I so naked?
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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