I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
