He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
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