how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
