He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
