i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Sorry my hands just texted you
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
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