I am spending my child support on dildos
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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