Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize