Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
