Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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