dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
