I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
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