The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
