Buhtt sex?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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