I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
