Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
