Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
