So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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