My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
