i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize