drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Randomize
