sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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