fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Randomize
