I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
