Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
this just has baby written all over it
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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