He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
