i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
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