I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Randomize
