We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I cut my penus on the lid.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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